Day 4

Hai baby, it's only Day 4. & i'm suffering like mad.

Mum got hospitalized this morning. I really just can't believe it that the people whom I loved the most on Earth is not around with me at all (for now). I miss my mum, i miss my dad, i miss you especially . I'm all alone now at home. I hate being alone. It's so scary, lonely & hurting.

I am so selfish. I just want the people i loved to be with me always. I just can't understand situations like this. I'm just dumb & naive.

Was missing you much. I took out the A|X shirt that has your smell on it from the plastic bag. The moment I took a deep breath, tears just keep flowing down my cheeks. I kept crying, I really really miss you so badly. I don't get to smell your smell which i used to everyday already. Your hugs that makes me feel secure, your kiss that always melt me, your laughter that makes me smile, your act-cuteness which makes me laugh & happy, your shoulder that i always lean on, your hands that i always hold, your words that's ever loving, your understanding, your patience, your fierce look, JUST EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU I MISSES. Words can't describe how much I need you. It make me realized that I can't live without you. If i were to collect the tears i've cried for the past few days, it can fill up a kiddy swimming pool already. I know you're crying too. But.... what can we do?

I thought that i can handle the situation well. But i proved myself real wrong.

I should have really really treasure you every single moment. I regretted saying those hurtful words to you before. Every cold war we had was just a waste of time. I promised baby, when you booked out, I'll cherish every single moment with you. I'll be the best girlfriend to you. I'll learn to be more understanding, patient, nice, gentle & more loving towards you.

You taught me many things, you've changed me.

I really thank God that he sent you into my life. Waiting for you is really worthwhile.... & i'll never regret it.

Thanks for worrying me even though you're in army. It's suppose to be the other way round though. But after every single day baby, i'll be stronger. Soon, it'll be my turn to be your strength & someone to reply on yea.

I love you baby.

Can't wait to see you on tues.

Really can't wait.

4 more days that we both gotta endure.

We can do it.

Goodnight. imy & irly.